From A Small Town Girl to A Full Time Traveler

“You’re gonna come back, they always do.” Those seven words rang in my head for two days straight as my best friend and I drove from Colorado to Oregon. Being from a town of 3,000 residents and a class of 80 graduates, it’s to be expected for everyone to stay around and only travel in small doses. Hell, I was even ready to accept my fate as a small town girl and prepared myself to stay around until the foreseeable future.

It was senior year and I was ready to take on the world. I decided to give cheerleading a chance, band was exciting as always, I was making more money at work, I was vice president in student council, I decided to write and direct my own play, my journalism teacher promoted me to editor, my newspaper internship was going well, and I had a new friend group that finally made me feel like I fit in somewhere. Not to mention, I couldn’t wait to start college. Everything was going according to plan, hell, I was even dating a football player.

Even though Prom was held in the school’s cafeteria and we could only use half of it as the dance floor, I was still happy with how everything turned out. I received enough scholarships to pay for over half of my tuition, my friend group was supportive, and my boyfriend at the time and I were making future plans. Nothing, and I mean absolutely nothing could touch Brandi Villagrana. That is until I was knocked on my ass, HARD! My now ex-boyfriend broke my heart right before graduation. He sat me down, looked me in my tear-stained eyes, and said “I want out.”

I had no idea what happened. Up until that point, I thought we were perfectly happy. It wasn’t until later when someone told me he was having a “hot girl summer” and I realized he just wasn’t ready for all those future plans we talked about. But I was, and I was devastated. Now I’m a bit of a dramatic person, but I’m not being dramatic when I say my first year of college was probably the worst year of my life. After the breakup, I realized my friend group was falling apart, I just didn’t want to accept it.

So there I was, heartbroken and stuck in a small town. You may be asking yourself, “Brandi, why didn’t you just choose a college further away from home?” Well, when I choose my college, I thought I should be close to home because I thought I would still be dating the guy that I was no longer dating. Not to mention, my scholarship offers were too good to turn down after already accepting them. But if I’m being completely and totally honest, I was having a hard time letting go of my past self. I kept imaging the future I thought my ex and I were going to have together, and my anxiety was at an all time high.

Even though the friend group split up, there was still one person who I kept in contact with. She wasn’t exactly “in” the friend group, she more so came around during the end. Nevertheless, we clicked and remained friends. Soon enough, she became my best friend, even with my anxiety all over the place. One night, she and I were venting about all the reasons we hated our home-town. Even though we were only graduated for four months, there had been several pregnancy and engagement announcements. It’s not like it’s a bad thing to dropout of college or realize you want to have a child at an early age, it’s just not the life I wanted. There was this feeling, boiling up inside me, waiting to get out.

One particular night, we were talking and stalking social media as normal. Except this night, “Sleep On The Floor” by The Lumineers came on. We both looked up to the screen and watched the most beautifully crafted music video play. Once the video was over, we both knew our lives were about to change forever. The next day, I asked about the steps to becoming an online student and started researching the different states. While out on our usual extravaganzas, it started raining. Instead of running to the car or seeking shelter, my best friend and I laid in the middle of the street, (no cars were coming, obviously) and took the deepest breath we could muster up. We both knew we wanted that feeling to last forever.

That’s when we decided on Oregon. Not only had our TikToks been flooded with Oregon content, but we wanted to try somewhere mystical. (The Disney show Gravity Falls may have also had an influence our decision.) We were set, and ready to go, but not without saying goodbye. While there were some people who wished the best for us, there were others who couldn’t help themselves. “You’ll be back,” was common for anyone to hear when they said they were leaving our hometown. It was as if there was an ancient curse condemning all the locals to stay exactly where they were.

I would be dammed if I let the curse condemn me too. I’ll admit, it wasn’t easy deciding to leave everything I knew behind. But I knew I would never have the chance to grow as an individual if I let the fear of change control my life. I didn’t want to live there for the rest of my life, so I officially changed my schooling to be done fully online, quit my high school job, packed my shit up, and left. Once my best friend and I finally reached Oregon and stepped inside our first home away from Colorado, we looked at each other, looked outside the window, and cried. In that moment, it didn’t matter what anyone else from back home thought about us. I just knew that I had finally broken the hometown curse. I was finally about to go from a small town girl to a full time traveler.